Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

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Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I can count

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

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I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I see through liars

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

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It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Fran Tarkenton on Jim Marshall: “He was the greatest leader . . . I’ve ever played with” - NBC Sports

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

Have anyone had an relationship of any kind with a spirit or demon, such as a succubus? If so, how was it?

I don’t buy bullshit

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I am glad you enjoyed my pictures. Do you have any photos to share?

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Which is better for your skin red light therapy or blue light therapy?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

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I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

What does Jesus mean in Revelation 3:3 when He states, "Wake up! Strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have found your deeds unfinished in the sight of my God?"

I actually pay taxes

I can read

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

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A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

How long will it take Christian president-elect Donald J. Trump to restore our nation's moral values?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Can you give an example of a documentary where the person telling the story believed it to be true, but it turned out to be false?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Do flat Earthers really exist? Why do they believe the Earth is flat?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have a reading level above third grade

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Now that Nigel has imploded his centre right U.K. Reform Party, in a fit of capricious impulse, do we have a credible alternative other than the RIGHT WING Rupert Lowe M.P. to save the impoverished British from the multicultural `benefits hugging`?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

How do flat earthers explain the Earth being stationary? Is this concept considered impossible?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”